Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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