just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
