I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
