are you still at the devil's house?
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
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