You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
