Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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