he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
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