In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
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