I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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