If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
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