Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
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