What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize