She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
