hell yes lets make some ravioli
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize