That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
