There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
