your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
