This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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