She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
