We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize