Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
