Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
