I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
The air was thick with penises
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
