like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
