just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
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