he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize
