belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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