the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
