We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
