he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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