So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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