So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
