woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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