I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
