her vagine was all disorganized.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
