next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
