are you still at the devil's house?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
