Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
