i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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