Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
