Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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