I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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