Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
