Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Randomize
