i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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