i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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