It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
