i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I am naked and annoyed.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
