Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
