I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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