Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Oh god it's open bar.
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