Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
