Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Randomize
